Holy fucking cow! The Replacements will be playing Riot Fest in Chicago (9.13-15), Toronto (8.24-25), and Denver (9.21-22) and it’s like jetpacks, time machines, peace in the Middle East, free coffee for life, and a balanced federal budget all in one announcement. When I calm down I’ll come up with more extraordinary events that’ll never happen in my lifetime. Until then, here’s where you get tickets.